THINKING OF TODAY

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

bachcha kaise kala paida ho gaya

Ek gora aadmi tha. Jab uska ladka paida hua toh woh kala tha.
Tabhi woh apni patni ke paas jata hai aur poochta hai, “Yaar main bhi gora tha tum bhi gori thi to bachcha kaise kala paida ho gaya”
Aur phir uski biwi ne jawab diya, “Darling main bhi HOT tum bhi HOT shayad bachcha jal gaya hoga.”

Hazur galti ho gayi

Maalik: Tum bathroom mein kyu ghus aaye, Kya tumhe pata nahi tha ki mein naha raha hoon?
Naukar: Hazur galti ho gayi, mein samjha tha begum sahiba hai.

underwear purchase karne

Bania market jata hai underwear purchase karne.
Bania: Yeh kitne ka hai?
Shopkeeper: Rs 500.
Kanjoos Bania: Arey bhai daily wear dikhaao, party wear nahi.

Aaj mera insaaniyat se vishwas uth gaya hai!

Ek chor amir aadmi ke ghar mein chori karne gaya. Tijori pe likha tha “Tijori ko todne ki jaroorat nahi hai, 452 number press karke sahmne vala lal batan dabao,tijori khul jayegi. Jaise hi batan daba alarm baja aur police aa gayi.”
Jate jate chor seth se bola: Aaj mera insaaniyat se vishwas uth gaya hai!

sab galat sangati ka asar hai

Wife: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye thay.
Husband: Kya bataoon, sab galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost… 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.

Saali is Beauty, Wife is Duty

**WARNING**
THIS IS NOT TRUE IN CASE OF EVERY SAALI. AND DO NOT TAKE THIS PERSONALLY!!
Saali is Beauty, Wife is Duty
Saali is Pension, Wife is Tension
Saali is Yummy, Wife is Vehmi
Saali is Pataka, Wife is BATAKA
Saali is Cool, Wife is Fool
Saali is Tooti - Fruity, Wife is Kismat Futi
Saali is Fresh cake , Wife is earth QUAKE
*Ek Dukhi Pati.*

Tumhare papa 500 rupees loan lete hai

Teacher: Tumhare papa 500 rupees loan lete hai. 10% interest ke hisab se woh 1 saal baad loan vapis karte hai. Batao kitne paise vapis karenge?
Bania’s son: Kuch bhi nahi.
Teacher: Tum maths nahi jante.
Banis’s son: Main toh maths janta hoon, par aap mere papa ko nahi jante.