"I will never confirm whether I worked in intelligence." -- Anna Chapman, who achieved celebrity status after she and nine others were accused of being Russian sleeper agents and deported from U.S. six months ago."
What we agreed to is not what we got." -- Cameron Winklevoss, who, with his identical twin, is trying to undo $65 million deal against Facebook they settled on in 2008 for a chance to win more; they say they had the original idea for the social networking site and Mark Zuckerberg stole it.
"Our campaign has not come to a stop. This will be a long battle." -- Wang Chen, head of China's State Council Information Office, referring to his country's Internet crackdown.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Zindagi ki asal khoobsorti
Zindagi ki asal khoobsorti yeh nahi ke aap kitne khush hain,
Balke
Zindagi ki asal khoobsorti to yeh hai ke dusre aap se kitne khush hain.
Apne Dushman Ko
Apne Dushman Ko Hazar Moqey Do
K
Wo Tumhara Dost Ban Jaye
.Aur
Apney Dost Ko Ek B Aisa Moqa Na Do
K
Wo Tumhara Dushman Ban Jaye..!!!
K
Wo Tumhara Dost Ban Jaye
.Aur
Apney Dost Ko Ek B Aisa Moqa Na Do
K
Wo Tumhara Dushman Ban Jaye..!!!
Zindagi
” Zindagi USTAD Se Ziyada Sakht Hoti Hai “.
USTAD Sabaq Dy Kar Imtehan Leta Hai..¤
Aur Zindagi Imtehan Ly Kar Sabaq Deti Hai..¤
Aur Zindagi Imtehan Ly Kar Sabaq Deti Hai..¤
Motivational
People are zealous for a cause when they are not quite positive that it is true.
*****************
I do not fear failure. I fear knowing that I did not do all that I am capable of.
*****************
Why settle for Good when Better is available and BEST is achievable?
*****************
The beauty of flying like an eagle is the ability to soar without looking back.
*****************
It was a high counsel that I once heard given to a young person Always do what you are afraid to do.
*****************
Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt you represents determinism the way you play it is free will.
*****************
To accomplish great thingz we must not only act but also dream not only plan but also believe.
*****************
Success is not final failure is not fatal it iz the courage to continue that counts.
*****************
1 best success comes after their gr8est disappointments.
*****************
Success is da sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.
*****************
Magnificent promises are always to b suspected.
*****************
I will follow the right side even to the fire, bt excluding the fire if I can.
*****************
Even with the best of maps and instruments, we can never fully chart our journeys.
*****************
Success is the prize for those who stand true to their ideas!
*****************
You can have everything in life u want if u will just help enough other people to get wat they want.
*****************
He who jumps to conclusions falls to their death.
*****************
Every success is built on the ability to do better than good enough.
*****************
The fear is worse than the pain.
*****************
Sometimes u cannot believe wat u see. You have to believe wat you feel.
*****************
Dont look down on anyone unless u are helping them up.
*****************
Take calculated risks. That is quite different from being rash.
*****************
If u do not hope, you will not find what is beyond your hopes.
*****************
The only way of finding the limits of tha possible iz by going beyond them into the impossible.
*****************
Nothing ll ever b attempted if all possible objections must first be overcome.
*****************
Our greatest glory iz not in never falling bt in rising every time we fall.
*****************
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
*****************
Constant dripping hollows out a stone.
*****************
If u can imagine it, you can achieve it; if u can dream it, you can become it.
*****************
Man is what he believes.
*****************
Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow. Delay may give clearer light as to what is best to be done
*****************
A positive attitude ll kindle the hearts of good people to do great things.
*****************
People who dont succeed r the ones who give up. Im not giving up.
*****************
Take calculated risks. That is quite different from being rash.
*****************
It is better to die on ur feet than live on ur knees.
*****************
I ve always felt it was not up to anyone else to make me give my best.
*****************
Enthusiasm is excitement wit inspiration, motivation & a pinch of creativity.
*****************
Dream as if u'll live 4ever, live as if u'll die 2day.
*****************
Every accomplishment startz wit the decision to try.
*****************
*****************
I do not fear failure. I fear knowing that I did not do all that I am capable of.
*****************
Why settle for Good when Better is available and BEST is achievable?
*****************
The beauty of flying like an eagle is the ability to soar without looking back.
*****************
It was a high counsel that I once heard given to a young person Always do what you are afraid to do.
*****************
Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt you represents determinism the way you play it is free will.
*****************
To accomplish great thingz we must not only act but also dream not only plan but also believe.
*****************
Success is not final failure is not fatal it iz the courage to continue that counts.
*****************
1 best success comes after their gr8est disappointments.
*****************
Success is da sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.
*****************
Magnificent promises are always to b suspected.
*****************
I will follow the right side even to the fire, bt excluding the fire if I can.
*****************
Even with the best of maps and instruments, we can never fully chart our journeys.
*****************
Success is the prize for those who stand true to their ideas!
*****************
You can have everything in life u want if u will just help enough other people to get wat they want.
*****************
He who jumps to conclusions falls to their death.
*****************
Every success is built on the ability to do better than good enough.
*****************
The fear is worse than the pain.
*****************
Sometimes u cannot believe wat u see. You have to believe wat you feel.
*****************
Dont look down on anyone unless u are helping them up.
*****************
Take calculated risks. That is quite different from being rash.
*****************
If u do not hope, you will not find what is beyond your hopes.
*****************
The only way of finding the limits of tha possible iz by going beyond them into the impossible.
*****************
Nothing ll ever b attempted if all possible objections must first be overcome.
*****************
Our greatest glory iz not in never falling bt in rising every time we fall.
*****************
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
*****************
Constant dripping hollows out a stone.
*****************
If u can imagine it, you can achieve it; if u can dream it, you can become it.
*****************
Man is what he believes.
*****************
Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow. Delay may give clearer light as to what is best to be done
*****************
A positive attitude ll kindle the hearts of good people to do great things.
*****************
People who dont succeed r the ones who give up. Im not giving up.
*****************
Take calculated risks. That is quite different from being rash.
*****************
It is better to die on ur feet than live on ur knees.
*****************
I ve always felt it was not up to anyone else to make me give my best.
*****************
Enthusiasm is excitement wit inspiration, motivation & a pinch of creativity.
*****************
Dream as if u'll live 4ever, live as if u'll die 2day.
*****************
Every accomplishment startz wit the decision to try.
*****************
सर्दी-खांसी
सर्दी-खांसी से बुरा हाल है
डॉक्टर को दिखाया है
हालत सुधर रही है
ढेरों कैप्सूल खाया है!
जब सर्दी-खांसी हो जाती है
मन चिडचिडा हो जाता है
नाक बहती रहती है
कुछ भी नहीं भाता है!
भगवान् बड़े रोग दे दे
पर दे न कभी सर्दी-खांसी
कुछ खास नुकसान तो नहीं होता
पर मन में छायी रहती उदासी!
सर में थकान सी रहती है
सब भारी-भारी लगता है
किसी काम में दिल नहीं लगता
बस सोने का मन करता है!
नाक सुड-सुड करता है
आवाज अजीब हो जाती है
कुछ दिन आदमी नहीं नहाता
छीकें खूब आती हैं!
मैं तो इतना हेल्थी हूँ
फिर भी सर्दी लग जाती है
प्रकृति के आगे जोर नहीं चलता
सर्दी-खांसी सालाना आती है
डॉक्टर को दिखाया है
हालत सुधर रही है
ढेरों कैप्सूल खाया है!
जब सर्दी-खांसी हो जाती है
मन चिडचिडा हो जाता है
नाक बहती रहती है
कुछ भी नहीं भाता है!
भगवान् बड़े रोग दे दे
पर दे न कभी सर्दी-खांसी
कुछ खास नुकसान तो नहीं होता
पर मन में छायी रहती उदासी!
सर में थकान सी रहती है
सब भारी-भारी लगता है
किसी काम में दिल नहीं लगता
बस सोने का मन करता है!
नाक सुड-सुड करता है
आवाज अजीब हो जाती है
कुछ दिन आदमी नहीं नहाता
छीकें खूब आती हैं!
मैं तो इतना हेल्थी हूँ
फिर भी सर्दी लग जाती है
प्रकृति के आगे जोर नहीं चलता
सर्दी-खांसी सालाना आती है
Aaj aasmaan mein taare
Aaj aasmaan mein taare aise chamak rahe hain,
Aaj aasmaan mein taare aise chamak rahe hain;
JAISE KAL CHAMAK RAHE THE !!!
Aaj aasmaan mein taare aise chamak rahe hain;
JAISE KAL CHAMAK RAHE THE !!!
well played
Aapne mere man se khela,
aapne mere tan se khela,
aapne mere dhan se khela
aapne mere tan, man, dhan se khela...
well played! well played! well played!!
aapne mere tan se khela,
aapne mere dhan se khela
aapne mere tan, man, dhan se khela...
well played! well played! well played!!
doob gaye yaaron
yar mein kitne ghar doob gaye yaaron..
Pyar mein kitne ghar doob gaye yaaron..
Pyar mein pandrah-bees ghar doob gaye yaaron..
(wah,wah,wah, wah....... taaliyon ki gad-gadahat)
Pyar mein kitne ghar doob gaye yaaron..
Pyar mein pandrah-bees ghar doob gaye yaaron..
(wah,wah,wah, wah....... taaliyon ki gad-gadahat)
Wo dekho ek sales ka Banda ja raha hai .
Wo dekho ek sales ka Banda ja raha hai ...
Zindagi se hara hua hai ....
Par "customers" se haar nahi maanta,
Apne presentation ki ek line isey rati
hui hai....
par aaj kaun se rang ke moje pehne hain,
ye nahi jaanta,
Din par din ek excel file banata ja raha hai..
Wo dekho ek sales ka Banda ja raha hai ...
Das hazaar customers mein se ache
Customer dhoond lete hain lekin ,
Majboor dost ki ankhhon ki nami
dikhayi nahi deti,
PC pe hazzar windows khuli hain,
Par dil ki khidki pe koi dastak sunayi nahi deti...
Saturday-Sunday nahata nahi ,
Weekdays ko naha raha hai...
Wo dekho ek sales ka Banda ja raha hai ...
Reporting karte karte pata hi nahi chala,
"Boss" kab maa baap se bhi bade ho gaye,
Kitabon me gulab rakhne wala,
Cigrette me kho gaya,
Weekends pe daroo pee ke jo jashn mana raha hai ,
Wo dekho ek sales ka Banda ja raha hai ...................................
Zindagi se hara hua hai ....
Par "customers" se haar nahi maanta,
Apne presentation ki ek line isey rati
hui hai....
par aaj kaun se rang ke moje pehne hain,
ye nahi jaanta,
Din par din ek excel file banata ja raha hai..
Wo dekho ek sales ka Banda ja raha hai ...
Das hazaar customers mein se ache
Customer dhoond lete hain lekin ,
Majboor dost ki ankhhon ki nami
dikhayi nahi deti,
PC pe hazzar windows khuli hain,
Par dil ki khidki pe koi dastak sunayi nahi deti...
Saturday-Sunday nahata nahi ,
Weekdays ko naha raha hai...
Wo dekho ek sales ka Banda ja raha hai ...
Reporting karte karte pata hi nahi chala,
"Boss" kab maa baap se bhi bade ho gaye,
Kitabon me gulab rakhne wala,
Cigrette me kho gaya,
Weekends pe daroo pee ke jo jashn mana raha hai ,
Wo dekho ek sales ka Banda ja raha hai ...................................
bachcha kaise kala paida ho gaya
Ek gora aadmi tha. Jab uska ladka paida hua toh woh kala tha.
Tabhi woh apni patni ke paas jata hai aur poochta hai, “Yaar main bhi gora tha tum bhi gori thi to bachcha kaise kala paida ho gaya”
Aur phir uski biwi ne jawab diya, “Darling main bhi HOT tum bhi HOT shayad bachcha jal gaya hoga.”
Hazur galti ho gayi
Maalik: Tum bathroom mein kyu ghus aaye, Kya tumhe pata nahi tha ki mein naha raha hoon?
Naukar: Hazur galti ho gayi, mein samjha tha begum sahiba hai.
underwear purchase karne
Bania market jata hai underwear purchase karne.
Bania: Yeh kitne ka hai?
Shopkeeper: Rs 500.
Kanjoos Bania: Arey bhai daily wear dikhaao, party wear nahi.
Aaj mera insaaniyat se vishwas uth gaya hai!
Ek chor amir aadmi ke ghar mein chori karne gaya. Tijori pe likha tha “Tijori ko todne ki jaroorat nahi hai, 452 number press karke sahmne vala lal batan dabao,tijori khul jayegi. Jaise hi batan daba alarm baja aur police aa gayi.”
Jate jate chor seth se bola: Aaj mera insaaniyat se vishwas uth gaya hai!
sab galat sangati ka asar hai
Wife: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye thay.
Husband: Kya bataoon, sab galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost… 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.
Saali is Beauty, Wife is Duty
**WARNING**
THIS IS NOT TRUE IN CASE OF EVERY SAALI. AND DO NOT TAKE THIS PERSONALLY!!
THIS IS NOT TRUE IN CASE OF EVERY SAALI. AND DO NOT TAKE THIS PERSONALLY!!
Saali is Beauty, Wife is Duty
Saali is Pension, Wife is Tension
Saali is Yummy, Wife is Vehmi
Saali is Pataka, Wife is BATAKA
Saali is Cool, Wife is Fool
Saali is Tooti - Fruity, Wife is Kismat Futi
Saali is Fresh cake , Wife is earth QUAKE
*Ek Dukhi Pati.*
Tumhare papa 500 rupees loan lete hai
Teacher: Tumhare papa 500 rupees loan lete hai. 10% interest ke hisab se woh 1 saal baad loan vapis karte hai. Batao kitne paise vapis karenge?
Bania’s son: Kuch bhi nahi.
Teacher: Tum maths nahi jante.
Banis’s son: Main toh maths janta hoon, par aap mere papa ko nahi jante.
pairo par khada kar dega
Krish: Doctor ne mujhe kaha tha ki woh do hapte mein mujhe pairo par khada kar dega!
Jack: Accha kya who aisa kar paya?
Krish: Ha uska bill chukane ke liye mujhe apni car jo bechni padi.
Krish: Ha uska bill chukane ke liye mujhe apni car jo bechni padi.
Beta papa se
Beta papa se: Papa main itna bada kab ho jaunga ki mummy se bina poochey ghar se bahar ja sakoo.
Papa thandi saans lete hue: Beta, itna bada toh abhi main bhi nahi hua hoon.
1 class ka bacha apni Miss se kehta hai
1 class ka bacha apni Miss se kehta hai.
Mai aap ko kaisa lagta hoon?
Miss: So sweet!
Bacha: To phir mai apne ammi abbu ko aap k ghar kab bhejun.
Miss: Wo kyon?
Bacha: Ta'kay wo hamari baat agay chalayen,
Miss: Ye kya bakwaas hai!
Bacha:
.
Tution parhne k liye..
Mai aap ko kaisa lagta hoon?
Miss: So sweet!
Bacha: To phir mai apne ammi abbu ko aap k ghar kab bhejun.
Miss: Wo kyon?
Bacha: Ta'kay wo hamari baat agay chalayen,
Miss: Ye kya bakwaas hai!
Bacha:
.
Tution parhne k liye..
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